Genre: Paranormal romance, drama
Type: Series
Characters: Devon, Leigh, Vladimir
Prompt:040. Sight
Characters: Devon, Leigh, Vladimir
Prompt:040. Sight
Word Count: 690+
Warning: coarse language, implied violence, nudity, adult situations
Rating: M- (coarse language, adult situations, nudity. N.B-Applies to the whole series)
Summary: Run baby run...
040. Sight
This picks up straight from the previous prompt 14. Lovers after Krisis drops Leigh off at home...
This picks up straight from the previous prompt 14. Lovers after Krisis drops Leigh off at home...
__________
Bridgeport, present day
Devon heard the car pull up and he went to the window just in time to see Leigh jump out of a red Porche. Krisis’ car. He knew his plates.
Is that where she’s been? The whole night? Fuck that shit!
He’d hardly slept, worried sick about her, thinking the worst, hoping for the best, and she was out, having the time of her life with the vampire. He'd called her a dozen times throughout the night to check on her, and each time he’d gone straight to her answering service.
Krisis Frost, I see you…I see what you’re about! He thought angrily, anticipating the day he’d get into a fist fight with the vampire. He couldn’t wait!
And damn Leigh! What was wrong with her? Didn’t she know vampires were trouble? It was one thing to work for them, but to socialize and disappear into the night until all hours of the morning was unacceptable. They had a lot to talk about. Lay down some ground rules.
He knew his sister though; she would stonewall him as soon as she walked through the door. Better wait until you’ve calmed down. He told himself. But talk they would. And he would forbid her from seeing the vampire.
If he had to choose between that zero, Travis, and Krisis, the former would win hands down. The man was a pathetic loser, with zero talent, painting rubbish Leigh had tried her damnedest to sell without success. But at least he was human, and he wouldn’t use his sister as a walking plasma pack…
He moved away from the window then, switched off the lights and went straight to bed. Leigh was home safe, that’s all that mattered for now. But they would talk…
Leigh quickly ran inside her building, pressed the elevator button to the second floor and waited; the lift was all the way on the 18th floor. She would take the stairs, but the stairwell was dark, since the landlord had not bothered to fix the lights for a good three weeks now. Perks of living in a slum building!
Her body was sore, but she tingled in all the right places when she remembered her six hours of passion with Krisis. She’d said it was just one night only. But she knew better. She wanted him. Again. And knowing her, and how she couldn’t resist him, she would have him…Soon.
Six hours in his bed, under him, on top of him, all over him, and she still wanted more. She was addicted to him. She touched her neck, gently rubbing the bite marks, they were itchy, sort of like a burning sensation, but Krisis had told her it would heal in a couple of days.
She trembled, like a leaf in the wind, again, when she remembered their first time, when his fangs had sunk into her flesh. She’d thought he’d be rough, and it would hurt, but surprisingly he’d been gentle, tender, taking only what he needed.
She’d felt light headed for a while after that, but he’d seemed to be more aroused, and she couldn’t refuse him, and he’d taken her again, and again, sending her into frenzied orgasms. She blushed when she remembered her wanton ways, feverishly whispering things she would never say to any other man…
Out of the corner of her eye, she caught a flash of movement, and she was instantly on alert. She looked around her, and relaxed a little when she saw she was alone.
“Go to bed Leigh, you’re tired, and you’re seeing things.” She mumbled.
The elevator doors opened then, and she panicked. She stepped back, feeling her way around, looking for the exit.
Vladimir smirked at her, undressing her with his intensely light eyes. She felt naked, and exposed, and instinctively she crossed her arms, covering her chest.
“What do you want?” She asked, her voice shaking with fear.
“You!” In one chilling move, he swooped in on her, tearing the soft flesh on her wrists. She howled in agony, but he quickly covered her mouth with his hand, stifling her screams…
~ Vlad............what have you done???
ReplyDelete~ No!no!no!poor Leigh!
~ Devon she is not safely home!Wake-up,Devon!Danger lurks outside in the foyer!
~ Loved it Val,but poor Leigh!
And that's how the cookie crumbles...They all knew this day was coming :(, well except for Devon of course :(
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading Karima, I just sent you a PM on DD.
LOL@ Kim. He is a vampire after all, and it was consensual. Krisis (the story) is based on a lot of game interactions. I know vampires in most fictional work don't feed from their lovers, and they prefer to hunt, but the option to drink from their beloveds is there in game and I'm running with it, and that's how Leigh and Krisis have this consensual relationship.
ReplyDeleteLet's hope it's not too late when he finds out. Thanks for reading.
NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! THIS BETTER BRING KRISIS BACK HOME TO FIND HER :( *tear* Poor Leigh let me at Vlad I'll put him in his place!
ReplyDeleteKristen, don't cry. It'll all be okay...not right now though...but soon. But I think we all knew this was coming.
ReplyDeletei'm all good :) but I hate to know how he uses her :( Krisis is going to kick butt now!
ReplyDeleteYeah, Leigh's disappearance should bring out the savage in him. But it's Devon I'd be worried about the most, he already doesn't like vampires, and the thought that his sister might be sleeping with one is pissing him off, so Vladimir going after her, will probably send him over the edge, and he'll start killing all the vampires :)
ReplyDeleteHow cute is Dev when he is upset? (I need rehab for this crush!) I knew she wouldn't be able to let it be! Krisis has too many things that are magnetic about him. His silence, his strength, all that sexiness!
ReplyDeleteI was surprised about the bite though. Then again, that is to be expected since with most vampires blood and sex go hand in hand.
Vampires always seem to have this sense of knowing...I wonder if her knows Krisis warned her or even if he can sense what they just did.
Dev is going to have to put his dislike for Krisis to the side to help Leigh when they realize she is gone!
OMG OMG OMG - he's STILL in that elevator with her! Will he let her go? WIll he take her somewhere? WIth all the blodd loss, will she live????
ReplyDeleteYou can't leave us like this!!!!!
I'll get the rehab's number to you ASAP, Qui. You have a serious crush on the man. He looks mean though when he frowns like that.
ReplyDeleteNope, at least she's honest with herself. She knows she won't say no, if and when it happens again.
Agreed, blood and sex, but I'll try and not make it graphic :)
Have you been talking to Karima again? We'll see in the next prompt.
Thanks for reading.
Wow, Jill, looks like Blogger behaved today :)
ReplyDeleteI think the next update should answer all your questions. Sorry, I wouldn't have left it there, but I'm feeling out of sorts today, and I didn't want to hassle with posting the next prompt. Thanks for reading :)
I finally caught up and holy cow, Valpre. <3
ReplyDeleteI don't even know what to say. All the other previous prompts were magnificent and I can't even think of words to describe how addicted to this story I am. I hate to be the one standing out, but I actually like Vlad! *hides from Krisis fangirls*. I think him and Tamsyn would make a deliciously evil team! ;) Keep up the great work hun!
Ugh, blogspot must really hate me. I don't know where my comment went (I'm probably just being a noob Dx ). I just wanted to tell you what a splendid job you are doing. Although I have obviously never been in Leigh's position, I feel like I can relate to her as a character and that takes talent. And I'm probably the only one, but I absolutely love Vlad *hides from Krisis fangirls*. Don't get me wrong, Krisis is a hot bunch of pixels, but I think Vlad would make a deliciously evil team with Tamsyn. ;) Keep up the great work hun, I'm loving it so far! <3
ReplyDeleteOh, and I hope Leigh's okay D;.
THIS POST HAS 2 PARTS YES! (Fair warning)
ReplyDelete-----------
OK! Boyfriend is fed, cleaned, dressed and off to work, NOW I can comment as I wanted to earlier. Again, as I said before, I sat here for I don't know how long 2 hours maybe? And read through each story (prompt). A few I reread, particularly the first 5, just to be sure I had the story down. And WOW!
For the record I'd like to state, I'm not a fan of romance stories and was pleasantly pleased to find yours is not a romance story. I mean I guess it is, but it's not the sappy, overdramatic, overblown kinda of mush I can't stomach to read. There is depth to the story, characters and relationships past the whole "I love you to death" thing. It's AWESOME!
The characters:
Krisis: OMG HAWTIE! YUMMERS! WHAT? YES! MORE PLEASE! I LOVE the name also (as well as Krimsyn) I've always loved "y" names. (yeah I'm weird) anyway, I really enjoy his character and how he is struggling to be around someone he is so reminded of past loves by. I knew he wouldn't resist for long (whoa talk about passion...6hrs?!?) and am glad they are finally together...ish.
Krimsyn: Terrific sister, I love her to bits. I really like that she's considerate and concerned for Leigh's feelings and tries to accomodate her.
Michaela: First thought about her was that she was going to get her uncle and Leigh together, didn't pan out like I'd thought though, but still great character, can't wait to see what else she reveals (besides an excuse for Leigh and Krisis to see each other).
J.D: Not enough play for this man, really. Need more please :D
Eloise: I love this friend. Need to see more. She deserves Devon (Sorry Leigh) being friends since 3rd grade and lusting for her brother for so long...I think, rather I know, their friendship would last even after a break up (if that happened) because she's not snotty like Tamsyn.
Ashleigh: Great protagonist. She has a hidden strength that it's explosive when exposed. WOOT! I knew her desires would win out...of course.
Devon: Step 1: Go to the hardware store, Step 2: Buy a lock, Step 3: Install the lock on YOUR BEDROOM DOOR, Step 4: Enjoy your privacy. I feel bad for this guy, he has to be in a constant state of blue balls LOLOL! Anyway if he can break rules, she can too, stop being so annoyed by your sis being with a vamp, you took her best friends...constantly. He is such a sweetheart though and so very loving!
Tamsyn: Delusional much? OMG girl get a grip and move on! What a freaking psycho! RUN DEVON! CHANGE ADDRESS, CHANGE CITIES, CHANGE COUNTRIES JUST RUN! And great job with getting Leigh in a bind! ARGH! How have you not met someone that has seriously laid the smack down yet?!? I want to slap her face so hard it would leave an impression of my hand for years!
Beau: Not as bad as his brother, he seems more weasly to me. I hate weasles. He wants to ruin someone else's life for his benefit...no sir, won't happen.
Vlad: Awesome baddie! Can't wait to see what he has in store for Leigh. Great backstory and the history/feud is intriguing!
The car: What a huge pile of crap! LOL! Trade up already! You deserve it!
With the characters done on to the writing:
ReplyDeleteYou have an amazing voice! The way you write is really great, I love that it's so adult and you take the time to check spelling and grammar (I said I was weird) which a lot of stories seem to have minimal attention to. Your attention to detail is awesome and I love how each character has their own styles as well as quirks and personalities. I've really enjoyed reading as their lives intertwine. You have a lot of humor in the story and I love it, keeps the story pushing forward and makes me laugh out loud (I scared my dog awake, she looked at me funny and then sighed...seriously!) There is so much emotion and intensity in nearly every scene, I was on the edge of my seat!
One thing I noticed though is sometimes you refer to the vampires as breathing or needing air. I just found it curious. I know the vamps are "evolved" was just wanting a little more info on that. Are their bodies still functioning to the point of breathing?
And on to the critics:
I don't know if people are blind, unaware or crazy, but there is really no explaining how your stories don't have more views/comments/readers. It's one of the most excellent and well written stories on these forums...blog...whatever. I'm truly a fan, keep up the great work!
P.S. The "read more" link at the bottom of some of the stories makes me giggle :P And it was quite hard to resist clicking. I was sad when I'd reached the last one...I am awaiting the next update :D
P.S.S. I read the thing about "may not continue after 50" if you stop somewhere in this story that doesn't please me, I will seriously hunt you down and strap you to a keyboard. If you thought Kathy Bates was nuts in "Misery" don't get me started. :)
Hmm...what a book (sorry). I've also placed this on your Sims Forums post.
OMG, Brookeshire, you caught up. WOW :)
ReplyDeleteI had no idea you were reading this. I appreciate you taking the time to read and leave feedback. I'm so happy to know you're enjoying the story, and that you can relate to the characters. You're probably the only one who's in Vlad's corner, and I like that, not everyone can or should be good :) Pray Krisis' fans don't clobber you with a hammer or something. I agree, teaming Vlad and Tamsyn would add a lethal twist :)
Again, thanks for reading.
Your comment came through twice. Guess blogger's having a "moment" when you posted.
Daijahv, you have made history :)
ReplyDeleteThis has to be the longest, detailed, comprehensive critique/feedback I’ve ever received, and you have no idea what it did to me. It brought tears to my eyes, and it made my day too, so thank you for making me cry and inspiring me to write more.
The first few prompts are a little confusing, especially because there’s a ten year jump in between and the prompts don’t track just one character, so I forgive you for going back to reread :)
And there I was thinking it’s too sappy and maybe that’s why most people don’t read it. I’m glad you gave this romance a chance. There are some genres I don’t give much attention to, like legacies, but lately I’ve come across so many fantastic legacies out there, and I’ve found myself enthralled, so I guess variety is good once in a while, and it’s good to jet out of our comfort zones.
Daijahv
ReplyDeleteThe characters-
Krisis, what can I say, if I had a “make real” button, I’d make him real pronto. He’s probably the only good looking male sim I’ve ever created. I’ve always wanted to use the name Crisis somewhere, I’m fascinated with the game Crysis since I’ve seen DH play it a few times, but I’ve never played it myself, but I liked the name and I swore I’d use it somewhere. I thought it would make an interesting name for a male character, and when Late Night came out, OMG I thought, perfect, I’ll use it on a vampire. But there is a meaning behind his and his sister’s name and it’ll will be explained in later prompts.
Krimsyn is one character that’s easy for me to write about and there will be more of her in later prompts.
You are so right about Michaela, I needed a way for Leigh and Krisis to meet, and she was the perfect scapegoat, but after the Beginnings prompt, I started thinking about her a lot, and I’d like to develop her character more.
J.D. hasn’t showed up much, but his development is in the works too.
Daijahv
ReplyDeleteEloise is the sister Leigh never had, and she’s secretly pleased she and Devon are together now, but she worries in case things don’t work out between them. Eloise, apart from Devon, is probably the only person who knows Leigh more than she knows herself. She picked up, within weeks of Leigh and Krisis meeting, that Leigh has feelings for him. And it took Leigh weeks to admit what Eloise knew in a few days. She can read Leigh like a book, and she’s a strong supporting character for Leigh’s development.
Ashleigh, you’ve summed her better than I could.
LOL @ the Devon description. I know, poor guy, he never gets a break. But he needs to listen to you and got those locks ASAP. He’s overly protective when it comes to Leigh, and he’s still holding a grudge against Krisis for almost attacking Leigh when they first met, so this new development between Leigh and Krisis does not sit well with him. And now that Vladimir has kidnapped Leigh, this will fuel his deep dislike for vampires.
Tamsyn is a delusional, spoilt little princess, and she strongly thinks the world owes her and her life should be blissful. But in that deep selfishness, she feels strongly for Devon, in her own twisted way she loves him, and he’s the only guy who’s been that patient with her, the only guy who met her neediness for so long, and now that he’s gone, this could send her spiraling out of control. But I don’t blame her only for the way she’s turned out, look at her relationship with her mother, it screams dysfunctional and unhealthy from a mile away, and both of them are in denial about the underlying cause for both their pain. Mother and daughter will have to confront the real issues sooner or later, and maybe they can start healing from there.
Beau loves the limelight, and being the center of attention. Krisis and Laura met through him, and as the story goes, the rest is history. He secretly resent Krisis for ruining his brother’s relationship with Laura, but he’s the passive aggressive type, and he won’t act rashly, but if and when he does strike it will be lethal, and could cost Krisis dearly. You won’t see much of Beau during the first 50 prompts. Again, he’s another scapegoat/ fall guy in the story, he was a way for Krisis and Laura to meet, and the catalyst for the feud between Krisis and Vladimir.
Vlad, I’m sure the next three prompts will please you greatly if you’re into baddies. I won’t say much on him, I’ll let the prompts speak.
Ah, the car. I love it to bits. Even now Leigh still drives it. It’s old and familiar, a constant reminder of where she’s been and where she’s headed. It’s been with her through major milestones in her life and she’s not willing to let it go just yet. She can daydream about the Toyota Prius, but that piece of junk still holds her heart. I’m glad you listed it with the characters, I think it has so much personality, and such a temperament. It reminds me of the Winchester brothers’ car in Supernatural.
Wow, I should have met you before I started Krisis, the character bios would have been up sooner :)
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ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
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ReplyDeleteI read a lot, so that helps when it comes to writing, spelling and grammar, and spell check is just a button away.
ReplyDeleteI’m glad you feel the characters are unique, I’ll admit, I have a terrible weakness when it comes to character development, sometimes I get the feeling I don’t even know my own characters, but having rough outlines of their bios help. I plan to make the bios more detailed, hopefully soon. And this talk with you has inspired me to get cracking :)
Funny, no one ever commented on the humor, and there were bits I threw in for laughs but no one pointed them out so I just thought I’m awful at being funny. LOL.
After 26 prompts, I’m happy to know you’re still enjoying the story and it’s keeping you on the edge of your seat.
The vampires in Krisis are a little different from the main stream vampires, and Krisis (the man himself) will explain that in a later prompt, so please do bear with me until then.
And on to the critics:
Or maybe we’re just the crazy ones :) LOL. Seriously though, I don’t mind so much that the story has received so little attention. It’s the constructive feedback I’ve received so far that counts for me, things people say and point out push me forward and make want to continue with writing. I’ll take 6 genuine comments any day, over a hundred “great chapter” comments. Your feedback left me floored and I had to sit for a few minutes to collect my thoughts before I responded.
You’ll have two “read more” links in today’s update :)
LMAO. I love Misery, both the book and the movie. Steven King rocks, and Kathy Bates did that role justice. I guess I wasn’t clear on that, there are three prompt tables, so that’s 150 prompts in total, after I’m done with the first table, I might move on to the second, or I might just carry on with the story without using prompts. So, I think we’re both safe. I won’t have to be strapped to the keyboard and you won’t have to go to jail.
I’ll go on and reply over there too.
I could just kiss you for this.
Well I wanted to say 'Great Chapter!' because it really was but a bit intimidated by all the textses above me T_T..so instead i'll say umm.. Amazing Chapter! Seriously!
ReplyDeleteAeon, please don't be intimidated :) I just meant that I'll take feedback from my constant readers any day, than from people just passing through. You've been a constant support of Krisis, and I appreciate that. I get that sometimes you won't have much to say besides "great chapter" and that's okay, I appreciate that you took the time to read it. So, are we good?
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you thought it was "Amazing", it's certainly a step up from "great" LOL :)
No! *runs away from thread*
ReplyDelete*gasp* This is soooo bad...Dang Leigh! You should have waited until you were inside to daydream!
ReplyDelete